In the world of relationships, achieving true intimacy goes beyond romantic gestures and shared adventures. It extends into the realm of finances, a topic often avoided by a lot of couples because it’s so sensitive and stressful. Building financial intimacy, which we define as the experience of feeling safe, seen, heard, and cared about in the many different elements of your financial life. It is also about being able to make decisions with your partner about life and money. Some Key Elements of Financial Intimacy include:
- Respect each other’s values.
- Be transparent and open — no secrets!
- Be willing to have frequent, straightforward discussions on money-related topics, including your financial history.
- Make each other feel heard, respected, and secure.
- Remain open-minded to learn about each other’s personal approaches.
Building financial intimacy with your partner is not just about managing money; it’s about cultivating trust, setting joint goals, and navigating the cash flow landscape hand in hand. At Get Priorities Straight, we embark on this journey together with you and your partner to help you both take the steps to unlock financial intimacy. Learn more about Get Priorities Straight for Couples
Establish Open Communication:
The cornerstone of financial intimacy is open communication. Create a safe and judgment-free space where both partners can discuss their financial histories, principles, and approaches to managing finances — for example, talking about how your parents approached their household finances, communication, spending/saving, and/or how you handled finances prior to this relationship. Sharing personal philosophies on money fosters a deeper understanding and empathy for each other’s financial journey. This transparency lays the foundation for trust – a key ingredient in any successful relationship.
Change to Shared Financial Goals:Identify shared financial objectives to create a roadmap for your future together. Whether it’s discussing priorities for spending, saving, and long-term planning, aligning your visions helps build a collaborative framework for decision-making. Joint goals provide a sense of purpose and direction, strengthening your bond as a couple.
Craft a Joint Spending Plan:
We recommend creating a joint spending plan. By our definition, it’s different from creating a budget. A budget is more like guessing how much money you’ll need in the future. Simply put, with a budget, you can’t plan to use money you don’t have yet. An intentional spending plan is about using the money you already have, including saving for things you don’t need to buy often. With a spending plan, you’re figuring out exactly how to use every last dollar you do have. Doing this as a team helps you manage your money well and ensures you’re both clear, accountable, and responsible about it.
Invest in Financial Education Together:
Take the initiative to learn about money management as a team. Attend workshops, read books, or consult with financial experts (including hiring an accountability coach or household spending strategist) to enhance your financial literacy. The shared learning experience not only deepens your understanding of financial principles but also encourages mutual growth and collaboration.
Schedule Regular Financial Check-ins:
Life is dynamic, and so are your financial circumstances. Schedule weekly family administration meetings, including financial discussions, to reassess your financial goals, adapt to changing situations, and celebrate achievements together. These discussions not only keep you on the same page but also strengthen your unity as a couple.
In the pursuit of financial intimacy, it’s essential to recognize that the journey is unique for every couple. Embrace your differences, communicate openly, and view money challenges as opportunities for growth.
As you navigate the intricacies of your cash flow landscape together, consider seeking guidance from experts like me at Get Priorities Straight. I provide support tailored to your unique partnership as a neutral third party with everyone’s best interests in mind to help guide couples working together. Get Priorities Straight is an adaptable system and accountability tool to help navigate all stages of life. It’s a framework to make decisions that can grow and change as couples grow and change together.
Schedule your Complimentary 25-minute Consultation at ScheduleWithDoug.com to see how we may be able to help you and your partner get on the same page with your money.